ugh, silicone plates everywhere

Silicone nursery items? Really, what obsession are people developing over these boring earth tones? Beige, sage, they’re everywhere. It’s like parents are on some kind of mission to drain every last drop of color from their homes. Kids’ items are supposed to be fun, loud, alive. Instead, here we are swimming in a sea of muted silicone junk because God forbid a baby’s plate isn’t Instagram-ready.

And what’s this about being modern? Since when did avoiding gaudy colors become synonymous with sophistication? The ridiculousness of following home decor trends into what’s supposed to be a kid’s space is beyond me. If I see another silicone bib that’s marketed as the ‘chic’ option for meal-time, I might just lose it. It’s a bib. It’s meant to get dirty, not match the hardwood floors.

What’s worse? The claim they’re ‘unbreakable.’ I mean, they’re silicone, duh. Who cares? I’ve never seen a kid run around wrecking crockery like some kind of tiny, unhinged bull in a china shop. Let them use plastic or whatever and throw in some ducks and bunnies. Stop pretending your dishes save the earth or elevate your social status.

Check whatever this is supposed to help with.